A couple of possibly underage drunk young ladies
Members of he H.K.C.L.A (Hare Krishna Cow Love Association) have inundated the office of the editors of Hare Krishna News over the recent revelations of the outrageous exploitation of underage cows, usually by getting them drunk, and then having them “flash” their teats for the prurient interests of older Hare Krishna celibate “holy men.” Here is one such letter (NSFW)
Dear editor
Please accept my humble obeisances!
All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
All glories to Srila Krishnapada!
All glories to Sri Sri Radha Govinda
All glories to Sri Pancha Tattva!
All glories to the Sankirtan Yajna!
All glories to Srimati Tulasi Maharani!
All glories to Sri Guru and Gouranga
All glories to Sri Vrindavana Dham!
All glories to Book distribution!
All glories to Bhakti Devi!
All glories to the Assembled Devotees!Your most worthless and fallen servant
Nitya-lila das adhikari
Here is another:
Dear editor
This is being sent while still in the fugue of anger, so I beg you forgive my offenses. It has recently come to our attention that while on a trip to Florida for a Cowkuli reunion and 24 hour moo-athon, some of our teenage calves were taken advantage of by so-called members of an official Hare Krishna “Cow Protection” group. They were told they were being taken to a party where nothing but nectar would be served by “senior Vaishnavas.” When they got there they were plied with so much “nectar” that in their sugar-intoxicated state they were able to be seduced into flashing their teats while being filmed by leering calfophile “senior vaishnavas.”
When we first saw these films being offered for sale on late-nite television advertising (for preaching purposes we were studying different cultures on The Learning Channel), we were shocked to see some of our calves in the ads. We immediately contacted the producer of the videos but were informed that our calves had signed consent forums. I than informed him that the girls were underage and were legally not able to give consent, and therefore he was making illegal cow pedophile videos and that I would be contacting the proper authorities. Well, that pervert just laughed, he then said:
“The age of consent for cows in Florida is 3, your girls were teenagers”
At that point my blood boiled and I told him that he would be born a million times as a worm in stool if he didn’t stop selling those videos! I then informed the local temple authorities — they told me they had “counseled” the offenders and that they were sent to India to perform purificatory austerities in the Dham. All was well and good. A few days later I got an anonymous e-mail explaining to me that I was being played for a fool, here it is:
Prabhu, I heard about your experience with your teenagers down in Florida, I sympathize with you. My girls and I had to go into hiding after trying to expose what was going on down there. Lucky for you that you live far away. It starts off with getting them drunk and comfortable with flashing their teats for fun, but gradually the real intentions of the “devotees” become clear. HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THE MOVIE “EYES WIDE SHUT?” IN THE MOVIE THERE IS AN UNDERGROUND CLUB SCENE HELD AT A MANSION WHERE VERY OLD VERY WEALTHY MEN ENJOY KINKY PERVERSIONS WITH YOUNG WOMEN. MANY PEOPLE HAVE PROVED THE MOVIE WAS BASED UPON THE SECRETS OF THE ILLUMINATI, AND THAT IS WHY THE DIRECTOR OF THE MOVIE, STANLEY KUBRICK WAS KILLED RIGHT AFTER IT ENDED FILMING. AS MOST DEVOTEES WILL TELL YOU — THE ILLUMINATI IS VERY REAL AND HAS INFILTRATED OUR MOVEMENT BECAUSE THEY FEAR THE MESSAGE OF SRILA PRABHUPADA. THEY ARE THE ONES WHO SET THIS ALL UP, THE GIRLS END UP IN KINKY PERVERTED PARTIES WHERE THEY ARE FORCED TO “ENTERTAIN” OLD COW FETISHISTS!
BEWARE, THEY ARE EVERYWHERE IN OUR MOVEMENT, AND WILL TRY TO SILENCE ANYONE WHO EXPOSES THEM.
YOUR WORTHLESS SERVANT
ANON DASA
Please get the message out, the glorious mission of Srila Prabhupada is in grave danger — from within, just like he predicted.
Your useless vile servant
Gopinatha Das Vanachari
President and Treasurer of H.K.C.L.A (Hare Krishna Cow Love Association)
Here is the offensive advertisement:
